


Cut Like Diamonds, We Were Made to Last

by integerOverflow



Category: Loki/Tony Stark - Fandom
Genre: FrostIron - Freeform, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, I can't tag (leave me be), Just. . .feels, Loki (Marvel) Feels, Loki Needs a Hug, M/M, Mild Paraphrasing of Canon, Odin's A+ Parenting, Tony Feels, so does tony, so much feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-27
Updated: 2017-12-27
Packaged: 2019-02-22 07:43:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13162419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/integerOverflow/pseuds/integerOverflow
Summary: A record of everything leading up to the events of Avengers Assemble, told from the varying POVs of Tony and Loki.If there's a light at the end/ Its just the sun in your eyes





	Cut Like Diamonds, We Were Made to Last

"You were both born to be kings."

They forget sometimes, Thor's friends and the rest of them. Loki was born to rule as well, and they forget, they forget, when they surround him in the Gjelros Forest, when dark shapes are circling him, and Loki is gasping, crying, willing for them to stop. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, can we please-"

They laugh, because they don't care, the four of them, they will never like him, never follow him, not like they follow Thor. One runs at him, and Loki trips over a root, green tunic muddy now, it was his favourite, Frigga would frown and ask "Been playing in the mud, again?" and he would look down and whisper "Yes." And Odin would raise an eyebrow, then pat him on the back and begin an empty speech about the makings of a man, a king, how a little banter, a few tussles build character and besides, how is he to rule if his peers do not respect him? Have heart, and so on, until Thor comes bursting into the room and Loki is forgotten.

*

"Stark men are made of iron."  
Tony Stark is fifteen, and blood is dripping down his cheek. Howard stands by the window, which looks over the skyline of 80s New York. A hand loosely cradling the other, knuckles blistered red.

Tony has everything, and he has nothing, he has French lullabies at night, he has starched collars and witty commentary, both provided by Jarvis during the day. He has his mind. He has integrated circuit boards and chemical formulae and runaway thermal reactions, he has photons and automated control systems and-

He has Howard's face in his field of vision, flying spittle, and screaming, he has a blonde women who sings French lullabies crying in the corner, he has Jarvis who starches his collars nowhere to he found when Howard downs his third shot.

*

Loki doesn't hurt, because he is better than them all, and he will show, to Odin, to Frigga, to Heimdall. He doesn't flinch when Odin grins at Thor, the golden boy, father's favourite, tall and strong and Asgardian perfection.

He doesn't hurt when the ladies crowd around the blonde head at balls and soirées and, at one memorable point, in his own bedroom, when the charming smile is turned his way and he can't help but tilt his head in acknowledgement.

He doesn't hurt, when the shadow threatens to engulf him, and a ravished dame stumbling out of Thor's chambers take one look at him, at his too lithe form, too pale skin, at his thin, spider-like fingers, and giggles.

*

Tony grows up mouthy and brash and charismatic. He grows up to be a disappointment, and everything piano lessons and his mother's etiquette preparations and Howard's beatings try to force out of him. But that's fine, because he is also a genius, and a playboy, and is very soon planning on being a philanthropist after he became a billionaire, and showed them all.

*

Loki has one thing, and it's his mouth. He grows, he grows into his thin shoulders and pointed face, and counts it as a victory when Frigga nods approvingly the first time he emerges in full ceremonial dress, and then immediately hates himself for it. Loki grows until he can use words like knives, and smiles like shields, until he knows when to smirk coquettishly and when to tilt his head considerably.

Perhaps he has Mother to thank. Thor inherited the brute force and the reckless instincts from Odin. Loki was left with illusions and trickery, a silver tongue and a pretty face from Frigga.

He tears himself down and starts again when it doesn't work, when the desired results are not created. It's still not enough, it's never enough for Odin, but Loki has more to grow yet.

*

Tony goes to MIT and he meets Rhodey, and prepositions him in the second week, desperate and pathetic, two things he sworn to never be, because he is made of iron, but here he is anyway, offering like he knows to best, offering everything he can. And Rhodey bundles his up, says _No, Tony_ and they get blinding drunk until he spills all his secrets and they swear at Howard and toast.

And Tony has someone.

He also has reckless parties where he is the youngest kid there, and older girls circling him like sharks drawn to water. Some, he tells he’s a virgin and they coo and aah, and promise to be gentle. Others, he tells that he fucked their best friends just for the hell of it (Who knows? It might even be the truth), and he becomes very accustomed to the sting of a slap. Through it all, Rodey takes him home, berates him, reminds him of coursework deadlines and angry professors, of missed calls from Mother and invitations to the Rhodes household for Christmas, Thanksgiving and Easter.

*

Loki has no one.

Loki is beautiful now, and they fear him. Liesmith. It hurts, because he knows who gave him that monicker, and then he steels himself, because he doesn't need anyone. He is his only ally, and they will all bow.

*

Tony is twenty-one, and he is at the top of his world. Sure, Daddy Dearest is dead, but now he has Stark Industries and Obie is there as well, and he is almost complete.

They call him the Merchant of Death, reporters shove pictures of destroyed villages in his face- he still wins the Apogee award, is listed in the Forbes Top Ten, makes frequent appearances in the Times, and People, makes equally frequent and much less savoury appearances in OK! and Star, but only because he is yet to have a holding interest in their stock.

*

Loki decides he doesn't need anyone.

"Thor. Odinson. My heir." And Thor smiles, beatific and dazzlingly handsome. He winks at Friga, who shakes her head, but even from here, Loki can feel the pull of that face, that glory. He could have loved Thor, in a different life- perhaps he would convince himself he did, when the fires of Hel are his companions for all eternity and redemption is his only choice.

But right now, today, Loki knows the truth, can feel it cold and hard and resolute, stemming from an alien place in his chest that only recently made itself known. It makes it all the more easier to let the lies flow when the Frost Giants make themselves known.

 *

Tony is twenty-six and he meets Miss Potts.

He snaps her up from a roomful of interns, all sweating and smoothing down suits tailored within an inch of their lives, and perhaps this is a classic case of the rags-to-riches story, of the handsome, wealthy man spotting the blushing intern fresh from a master's degree at Brown, except Pepper wasn't blushing and they both eventually stop pretending who really needs who in their relationship.  
(It's not the genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist.)

Tony spends another decade playing at being happy. He drinks, he gambles, he sleeps around. He pretends he doesn't see how Pepper’s knuckles are white over the coffee she gives him in the mornings after, when the blonde/ brunette/ whatever the hell he wanted in the moment is still in the kitchen half-nude.

He lives for the applause, for the girls and for the creating.

He thinks he’s happy.

*

Loki has no one, until Odin reveals his heritage and Loki thinks its fitting. He walks into the Jotunheim throne room, and Frost Giants stare at him, and red eyes meet green. Like recognises like, Laufey's son recognises Laufey. His father has a throne, but its not the throne Loki wants, and so with a quick rearrangement of goals he smirks and proposes his plan. Invade. Murder.

He will show them all.

(And somehow he doesn't have the backbone for patricide, no matter if Odin is not his true father, he murders his true father, and Frigga runs to him, and Odin seems to smile, and for a second he has it all.)

 *

And then. Afghanistan. A man whose fingers were steady enough to save a torn heart, and whose words were strong enough for Tony to steal a little of that conviction, and gain a taste of what bravery was like.

Waterboarding (dear god, they weren't creative, but it doesn't hurt any less), a dark, cool cave, kneeling before men with guns, or, as he liked to think of it, guns held by men. Sobbing, screaming, seeing Miss Potts and Rodey and Obadiah.

Seeing Yinsen close his eyes one last time.

And then Tony really was a man of iron.

*

Loki never tells anyone. Once, a lifetime ago, before he even reached his first century: he sneaks into the vault where the Tessaract is kept, but just this time he doesn't gravitate towards the most powerful thing in the room. Instead he grips the leather handle of the Mjolnir, the Hammer that would only lift for the worthy, thinks of the dark shapes in the forest, of father’s too-strong grip on his back, and squares his shoulders. I will be worthy.

And it lifts.

Now, nearly a millennia later, (after his little meltdown of: “Because no matter how much you claim to love me, you could never have a Frost Giant sitting on the throne of Asgard!”, and after the rather humiliating words of: “Your birthright was to die,” uttered in front of the entirety of the Asgardian court, after breaking so many, many times. . . ) He stares at the same Hammer, surrounded by Midgardians in white coats and mud like a roiling sea threatening to engulf him. Just after he told Thor to never come home, banished his brother to Midgard for all eternity. Was that not strength? Was he not worthy? Had he not given _everything_ -

He grips it.

(“Your birthright was to die.”)

Pulls.

(“Your birthright was to die.”)

It doesn't even shift.

(Perhaps Odin was right.)

*

Tony has his failings shoved in his face like never before. Obadiah, the greedy son of a bitch, steals his heart and Tony kills him. He also kills the Ten Rings in a rather foolish but terribly therapeutic vigilante mission, realises Pepper is his one and only, and says to the world, “I am Iron Man.”

They love him for it, really.

*

“I would take the stairs on the left.” He watches the monster look at him consideringly, and turn left.

What had he done, what had he done-  
Later the guard tells him the news, Frigga murdered, dear old Frigga, the one who he inherited his words, his looks, his everything from. And he is not to attend the funeral.

Loki screams, tears at his golden cage, destroys the furniture and himself. Grief does not suit him, he thinks distantly.

And then Thor walking down the dungeon steps, and dear god, he feels that man’s presence like nothing else. He spins around to weave the bare semblance of an illusion around himself, slicked back hair, green robes, and Thor, of course he does, just sees through it all. “Enough with the illusions, Loki,” and he shows himself, shows him everything.

*

Stark is thirty-seven and too old for this shit.

He agrees to join Fury's super secret boy band, has a drunken brawl with Rodey, makes a senator swear on national television. . .and is currently dying.

Well. They all will someday. In the end, Yinsen's sacrifice was for nothing. A meaningful death or an empty life? He thought he knew the answer in an Afghan cave, the heat and grit clouding his perception until he swore to a dying doctor to be a better man. In the end, it all comes down to nothing.

Oh, and Pepper leaves him.

(Predictable. In fact, he hypothesised it. Laid out the control variables (his jackassery, sleeping around, drinking), the dependant variables (certain moments of vulnerability, gifts- the strawberries, he tried, okay?- opening his fucking heart) and the independent variable, the end-all, be-all fucker. It looked like his little venture into love proved his hypothesis. They all left in the end.)

*

Loki laughs at his brothers antics, with his love of Midgard and his affection to one particular Jane.

And then he meets Tony Stark, brilliant and immortal, (because heroes were immortal) and that was all Stark was: a man of iron, forever carved into the legends of the humans.

And he supposes that he is the villain in this story, but when he meets Stark's eyes in his glass tower, Loki starts, because they are similar after all. A shadow, a glimmer, of himself reflected in the puny mortal, Stark's heart glows, and yes, they are not too dissimilar after all: hearts of greedy power in both of them.

He thinks it is fitting that this mortal is a regarded as a king in this realm. They idolize him, paint pictures of his likeness and call it masterpieces, talk endlessly of the short- no, sorry, _compact_ \- man who revolutionised clean energy, satellite imagery, homing signals and before that, nuclear ballistic missiles and the whole of modern warfare.  
Loki doesn't know what nuclear, ballistic or missiles mean in this context, but never mind that.

He always had a weakness for pretty things.

*

Stark is still thirty-seven, or so he tells everyone, and he knows a broken man when he sees one. Loki is beautiful, all sharp edges and elegant, empty gestures, meant to blind the audience to the real brilliance going on behind a frivolous mask. He offers him a drink- a salute, what have you, to ceramic pieces being forced together again into a semblance of a man, through sheer force of will.

Loki is broken and it is a triumphant thought.

*

(Somewhere else, in a different, different world, Tony Stark is a little less broken, a little less able to recognise himself in the pretty, derisive eyes of a god.

He flies a missile into a wormhole, and thinks, I'm a hero made of iron. Every hero needs a girl, so he calls Pepper, except she doesn't pick up, of course she doesn't, and the hero made of iron dies alone.

In that world, Loki has a muzzle strapped around his mouth, and is taken to the Asgardian court for punishment. Here, Odin is no less ruthless.

He orders Thor to sew Loki’s lips shut. He begins to struggle, he screams, but they hold him down, and Thor, face as white as stone, holds a needle. )

**Author's Note:**

> *nervous laughter* Soooooo  
> Wadya think?  
> Last time a wrote a fanfic was a year ago. No, correction, last time I wrote a fanfic that I actually posted was a year ago.  
> So. *more laughter, edging on the edge of hysterics.*  
> Its 1am and I'm posting.  
> Be kind.


End file.
